This morning I awoke at 4:20 a.m. to do some moon-bathing. It was mind blowing to see the sun come up with the full moon together in the sky this morning. The energy we receive from the moon is different than the energy we receive from the sun and without risk of overexposure. The moon is energizing. The full moon in Scorpio is here to clean emotions and renew vision.
Scorpio is a water sign and water deals with our emotions. Scorpio is the sign of death and rebirth. The symbol is a scorpion but it also a bald eagle for its ability to see clearly through a situation instinctually. Scorpio helps us see what needs to die emotionally to give life. Scorpio is the still, deep waters of intuition in the water signs.
Under this full moon like retrogrades we use this time to heal and be aware of what needs to die or be realized emotionally to live fully in the next phase. I immediately felt my father this morning as I was outside where my dad lives. He was always outdoors by a homemade fire at home, even when not camping, backpacking or sleeping under the stars. Every time I’ve seen him after his death it’s outside under a tree. His suicide or death-day is almost here May 6, four years ago. This morning I realized there is still pain there. It is a different pain than what I have experienced already, more of a release I believe. More of a desire to have closure. To honor my dad for the amazing things he taught me and forgiveness for what he did taking his life from so many people that loved him. However I am truly realizing in his pain he was unable to see his value. That is where I can release him is that he is free. Sometimes we go through hardship to grow beyond what we would if we didn’t experience that hardship.
Suicide is a bitch slap. You are not ready. You aren’t prepared and it is very different than natural death or someone passing with illness. It takes you through cycles of grief it feels endlessly. I love him and am thankful for his teachings with nature. I miss him. I feel like I’m moving into acceptance in the grief cycle. Acceptance is the desire as we climb the grief ladder and the last stage.
This pink Scorpio moon really is here to heal. You have tonight as an opportunity to bathe or take walks, sleep under this full moon. I will sleep under it tonight if the wind ceases. It recharges us and heals us if we are open and allow it to.