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Because it’s funny

The other day a client brought her dog into the salon, which is not uncommon anymore, kinda like children for many people. I think they are actually called emotional companions.

Her dog was sitting on her lap, dressed in an expensive knit pastel cream, blue, and pink sweater, while I applied her color. I bent down to pet the dog, when I heard this “grrrr” come from the dog’s mouth. My hand quickly pulled away; in my home what that sound means coming from my dog’s mouth is “get the f$!# away now!” So when my client said, laughing, “that’s just him talking– do it again, you will see.” I felt confused and terrified simultaneously. I wanted to believe her, that her dog was talking to me, however in my experience with animals and growling it has never compelled me to engage any further, but the opposite.

So I just reminded myself my only job was her hair; I didn’t need to be brave or prove something, so I just said, “I really need to get some stuff done, what a cute dog.”  $T2eC16ZHJIQE9qUHuEnPBRb+1rEDlQ~~60_3

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Listen

This thought about listening, made me think as humans we tend to listen to react, instead of listening to hear. I am guilty of this. Awareness is our number one friend, if we see our behavior we can change it. The key, I think is to go into situations on purpose to find out what is being said in the correct context it is being given. Let the other person completely finish their thought before speaking, ask questions if we aren’t clear, don’t assume.

Also don’t personalize what is being said. Listen from the most objective point of view. Everyone is the star in their own movie. People are absorbed in their own lives just like we are in ours. Just with that objective we can hear them speak, hear their voice, hear the tone being used, just listen. An incredible thing happens when we are still in ourselves and focused on listening, empathy comes in for that person and what they are going through. Communication happens when we are at work, drama is avoided because we did not assume but asked questions to be clear in what was being said.

When we have had conflict it usually involves a lack of listening on someone’s end. Today remember to just listen, it will bring peace like a river.

Namaste ♡

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Desperately seeking a minimalistic lifestyle

PhotoGrid_1424054841738        I have not written in a very long time, I put my efforts into my physical, mental health because in the fall I was hospitalized four times. My weight dropped to 100 pounds, I am 5’6, I looked like skeletor.  I noticed however I was gaining muscle in my biceps from picking up my newly born grand daughter daily. I decided I should do that to my whole body and start weight resistance and yoga. It was impossible to gain weight and I had no appetite. The stress of my life had taken me down. My father’s suicide was a wrecking ball to my family.

I was on a ton of medications to control my panic attacks, anxiety, and extreme depression. My nightly sleep was about 4 hours. I was finally kept in patient at the hospital for a week because of my weight loss and depression. I meet with three psychiatrists for fifteen minutes with three different ways to handle my medications in the hospital. Finally in my aftercare I meet with with  my fourth psychiatrist who spent an hour with me going over my life the past year and all the traumas my family had gone through, she was able to get me on one medication to relieve all my symptoms and validated what I had gone through. She also helped me get into classes for dealing with the trauma through mindfulness, meditation, living in the moment and  distress tolerance skills. These practices daily saved my life and continue to help me grow stronger,  along with yoga and strength resistance for a physical outlet.

A couple years ago my good friend who is a physical trainer and competitive bodybuilder taught me pilates and strength resistance. At the time my mental state was more I should be doing this versus I want to do this. My results were just that because I wasn’t connecting to it. I took everything she taught me and put it into practice 6 days a week. I am going on week 11.

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As I have been practicing all of these skills daily, I am in awareness of how much stuff I own. We lack nothing. In order to have this lifestyle it requires a lot of time working.  When we say, “I don’t have time”. What are we doing with our time? Where is our energy spent doing? Consuming the latest thing?  I am grateful in way to be faced with selling my home in my divorce. I am forced to deal with my stuff, it doesn’t make me happy. What makes me happy is when I have time to do things I love and have passion for. If that means minimal living to have more time for my family and the things I want to do, I am down! I am sure my future writing will be about this journey I am on to have more peace in this life.

Life is always changing. The control we have is our response. Every day is new. We are a gift from God.

Namaste ♡

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